Friday, March 31, 2006

March Madness & Work Sucks

So it looks like Mr. Shaun Campbell is most likely gonna win the 1st annual NOSE/RRR March Madness Tournament pick 'em. Congratulations Shaun on an amazing first round and following it up with some solid couple of rounds. Mr. Tasker is sitting in third place and has a possible chance of pulling it out with a win by UCLA. And that could very well happen with how the rest of this tourney is playing out. The boys here at NOSE both scored higher than our buddy Emily over at Red Red Rine so let the shit-talking begin.
Work as been extremely brokeback this week. One of our counter salesman blew out his knee a couple of weeks ago. He's been wearing a brace on it and to the doctor a couple of times and the doc decided he needed to operate. So Bob (totally a fake name) is home recouping from surgery. Guess who gets to work his job? And still have all of my regular responsibilities too. I've been so tired every night this week that I go home, watch TV for a couple of hours and usually fall asleep on the couch.
I probably won't be writing much for the next week so I will leave you with what could possibly be the most racist robot joke evah. Hope you enjoy it.
A business man is in a new town where they just built a brand new, five-star golf course. The business man goes to the golf course and approaches the man behind the counter in the pro shop and says, "I would like 18 holes of golf and a caddy."
The man behind the counter says, "The 18 holes of golf is no problem, but all of the caddies are out on the course. What I will do for you is this. We just got 8 brand new robot golf caddies. If you're willing to take one with you out on the course and if you will come back and tell me how well it works, your round of golf is on me today."
The golfer obviously accepted the man's offer.
He approached the first tee, looked at the fairway and said to himself, "I think my driver will do the job." The robot caddy turned to the man and said, "No sir. Use your 3 wood. A driver is far too much club for this hole."Hesitantly, the golfer pulled out his 3 wood, made good contact with the ball, and the ball landed about 10 feet to the right front of the hole on the green. The golfer, delighted, turned to the robot and thanked him for his assistance.
As the golfer pulled out his putter, he said, "I think this green is gonna break left to right." The robot then again spoke up and said, "No sir. I do believe this green will break right to left."
Thinking about the last time the robot corrected his prediction, he decided again to listen to the machine. He made his putt and birdied the hole, thanks to the robot and his advice.
But his luck didn't end there. His entire game was the best game he ever played, thanks to the assistance of the new robot golf caddy.
Upon returning to the clubhouse, the man behind the counter asked, "How was your game?"
The golfer stated, "It was, by far, the BEST game I ever played. Thank you very much for letting me take one of your robots. See you next time I am in town."
A couple of weeks pass, and excited, the golfer returned to the pro shop.
Upon entering the pro shop he turned to the man behind the counter and said,"I would like 18 holes of golf and one of those robot golf caddies, please."
The gentleman from behind the counter turned to the man and said, "Well, the 18 holes is no problem. However, we had to get rid of the robots. We had too many complaints."
Confused, the golfer cried, "COMPLAINTS? Who in the hell could've complained about those robots? They were incredible."
The man sighed and said, "Well, it wasn't their performance. It was that they were shiny silver metal, and the glare from the machine was blinding to other golfers on the fairway."
The golfer said, "So then why didn't you just paint them black?"
The man nodded sadly and replied, "We did. And then four of 'em didn't show up for work, two filed for unemployment, and the other two robbed the pro shop."

3 comments:

Emily:) said...

Hey, if the 40 points you have over me makes you feel like big cock on campus, let it be my friend! Just remember that I didn't sell out my home state and pick UCLA over Gonzaga;)

Might I remind you btw of your stellar choices of Seton Hall AND Southern Illinois going to the Sweet 16. Way to go Mr. Wizard! Is that smack enough for ya punk?!

Gus said...

losing and talking smack is still losing.

Emily:) said...

LOL, very true my friend:)