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DAMMIT!

Why don't I take my own advice? After those horrible shopping experiences, and promising myself I won't shop til next month, I drive by Hollywood Video and see 5 DVDs for $20. I think "finally, the best sale yet." I am in the wrong lane, so I go through the intersection, take the next available left...and can't fucking turn left again because there is too much traffic. So I turn right, go another block, turn left and through a parking lot, and back on to that street headed back to Hollywood.

And what do I get for my extra trouble of 4 minutes worth of driving to go essentially 50 yards? The DVDs are 3 for $30, except for one fucking rack of DVDs from late 2005. "So I can pick 5 of the 9 choices?" Fuck you.

If I hadn't been wearing my work shirt and easily identifiable as someone working only 2 blocks away, they would have got a nice big "POOKIE, LET'S BURN THIS MOTHER FUCKER DOWN!" Bastards. Next time I go shopping I am purposely peeing on the floor next to the toilet.

weekend time

That is awesome. I want some non-monetary compensation. I was thinking golf, but punching people would be fun too. Or wackin em with my wiffleball bat.

And if anyone could please turn off the rain for the weekend, that would be nice. Our wiffleball game got rained out (yes we are wussies) and hope to play this weekend and have the kegger, I mean all star game, and need to not be raining.

And tons of movies coming out. I want to see X3 , and Abby wants to see DaVinci Code, which I have not read yet. Is it as good as everyone says?

3 flushes

You know you are having a good day, when 2 flushes just isn't enough.

And it's definitely better than days where you blow mud so loud and so fast that you scare the cat.

Wiffleball

As you have heard on here before Gus and I are participating in the first season of the Cowlitz County Wiffleball Association. We are just about to the halfway point of the season, save for two games that will be played tomorrow and Friday night. This weekend we are having our All-Star game / Homerun Derby / Kegger. If you are in the Longview/Kelso area this weekend and want to drink some beer and have a good time watching some wiffleball, Jones field in Kelso is the place to be. There are directions on the CCWA homepage so you know where to go and the festivities will be getting under way at about 1 in the afternoon. A keg cup will run you five bones and there are rumors of maybe having a little BBQ action. And Mike Jones will be there. No, not the rapper Mike Jones from Houston, but the one and only Mike Jones with his nuts pierced. That alone is worth the price of admission*.
So you should all come out and have some fun and drink some beer. Erik and I will both be participating in the derby and the game. We are both playing on the same team, so the opposition is pretty much doomed from the get-go.

*admission is free, and seeing Mike Jones is definitely worth that

Two great stories in one great post

Great Story #1
Hey guess who didn't know that WinCo doesn't take credit cards?
That's right, I rushed into WinCo to pick up some pop for a work BBQ, because even though I have never been there, and don't like the fact that it drove 2 good Market Places out of business in our town, it was the closest and off I went.
I'll be back in 10 minutes right?
Wrong.
First I have to go through their Disneyland line style store to get to the pop. Then I load up a cart. Then I get pissed even more by finding later that two 12 packs are cheaper than one 24 pack. The 12 packs are on a display after you go by all the other items, so either switch em, or bitch about it. I choose the latter because I am in a hurry, so I jump in one of the few open lines without switching them out to save a few bucks, behind the least scummy person who isn't rolling at least two full carts up to the line. (Hey porker, saving $.25 on all your items does not save you money if you buy $50 worth of shit you don't need!)
After the inept checker helps the inept customer in front of me, it is now my turn to be embarrassed and inept, because I only have my credit card, and they don't take them. Oh they take debit, or cash, or checks, or I can use the ATM to withdraw cash, but they don't take my most convenient form of payment, credit card. And the only sign for it is the one next to the debit card machine, which I ignored because it looks like every sign in the world that says we take credit, debit, and cash, but no checks, except they switched the words around to keep it a secret.
So, 10 minute drive and 10 minutes at the store at Fred Meyer, and it only took me 40 minutes to make a 10 minute trip. I now hate WinCo. I also would like to meet the braniac financial minds that think they lose more on Credit Card Fees than they lose on bogus checks, fraud, and the cost of processing all those checks. Plus all the business they lose from people like me, who hate them.

Great Story #2
Subway sells gift cards that they call Subway Cash Cards. You would think that these would be useful for purchasing sandwiches. They even say on the back:

• More Convenient Than Cash
• Use your SUBWAY Card to pay for SUBWAY purchases with a single swipe.
• visit www.mysubwaycard.com, or any participating SUBWAY restaurant to reload your Card or check your balance.

Wellllll, me, myself, and I would like to say "YOU SUCK." Abby and I got this card as a gift from our volleyball team. So we should be talking free sandwiches baby. But the cost in embarrassment and frustration is now way over the $5 or $10 value of this thing. I have been turned down at no less than 5 Subways in Washington and Oregon, and have been carrying this card around for about 3 months now. I stopped trying after the first month, so the total would be a lot higher if A.) I felt like trying more B.) I didn't have a friend with a Quizno's (who I might add accepts their gift certificates at all restaurants) and C.) didn't decide to wait until I could go back to the exact Subway where the card was purchased so that I know it will work.

Oh contraire, monfraire. I got a new hassle. Apparently the card has not been activated. Luckily unlike WinCo, I had enough cash to complete the transaction, and even if I didn't they would have taken a credit card. Otherwise you might be reading about a 28 year old banker from Washington who is sitting in jail with an empty stomach awaiting arraignment. Fuckers.

Luckily I already cleaned out Fred Meyer of their stock of wiffle balls and I have a full case of beer and BBQ stuff for the long weekend, because I don't feel like shopping again til next month.

My Top 25

As I have written on here before, I *heart* my iPod. Never did I think a little piece of electronics would change my life in such a way. Currently I am right around 5600 songs on the bad boy. I am always looking for some new tunes so if anybody reading this out there (all 3 of you) has an suggestions, suggest away! Here are my top 25 as of right now;
Bad Religion, 21st Century (Digital Boy)
"Franks & Beans" audio clip from Something About Mary (hilarious)
Trick Daddy, Let's Roll
cKy, Sink into the underground
the Kinks, Lola
Rolling Stones, Beast of Burden
Tom Petty, Refugee
Jay-Z, 99 Problems
Rolling Stones, Gimme Shelter (quite possibly the greatest song evah)
Rolling Stones, Start Me Up
Velvet Revolver, Slither
Jimi Hendrix All along the Watchtower
Modest Mouse, Ocean breathes salty
Offspring, All I want
Bush, Machinehead (greatest driving song evah)
Modest Mouse, Float on
Rancid, Radio
Rolling Stones, Brown Sugar
Method Man & Redman, da Rockwilder
Rolling Stones, Shattered
Snoop Dogg, Snoop's upside your head
Green Day, When I come around
Beastie Boys, Fight for your right
Rolling Stones, Start me up
The Roots, The seed (2.0)

Damn I knew I liked the Rolling Stones but six out of twenty-five is a little ridiculous. What's on your list?......