So my buddy Garrett is going to get married this weekend. It should be a terrific ceremony and a lovely reception will follow. We are all so proud of him.You see, Garrett has never really been a "ladies man". With a nickname of 'Teabag' it isn't hard to understand why.
Garrett spent many a night crying in his room and masterbating furiously. Just look at the size of his arms. He's never lifted weights a day in his life. Those muscles are from years and years of self-pleasuring.
And then he met Mrs. Right. And they are happy. Very, very happy. Because he keeps her doped up on Rohypnol. Lots and lots of Rohypnol.
So the guys here at NOSE would like to thank the fine makers of Rohypnol, for helping our pal Garrett get a wife. Keep up the great work!
5 comments:
Masterbating furiously? That must be why the fucker hasn't called me back to go get his last single beer. He has been having his 5th to last, 4th to last, 3rd to last, 2nd to last, and last battle with the skin snake of his single life.
I just heard that the reception for said wedding might be dry. SAY IT AIN'T SO BOOTH!
I just heard that the reception for said wedding might be dry. SAY IT AIN'T SO BOOTH!
I was going to chime in to say "you boys are just jealous, all the girls had crushes on Garret" but then I read Eriks' comment on his wedding being dry, and well- I just can't agree with that.
Wait wait... I got the wrong Garret...
My bad. But I'm sure all the girls had crushes on this one too.
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