Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Slowly moving away from superbowl talk

I realized what was really important.
As you can see from the previous post, and the one to the left, it will be a while before we drop the superbowl issues that we have, but for now, here is some unrelated humor.
First, taken out of context, anyone can have a "quote of the day"...
"I love the airplane with the small dick"
-Nate

Second, Willie finally got off the ship in Cali, and apparently waded through months of useless fowards that he had been skipping past in his email. He sent this cool site colortest (beat my 88% on the first try if you can) and this is the best funny one he sent to me:

The Point System
In the world of romance, one single rule applies to the men: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do somethingshe dislikes, and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the point system
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SIMPLE DUTIES:
You make the bed. (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow. (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets. (-1)
You go out to buy her what she wants. (+5)
In the rain. (+10)
But return with beer. (-15)
You check out a suspicious noise at night. (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing. (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something. (+5)
You pummel it with an iron rod. (+10)
It's her pet. (-25)
==============================
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS:
You stay by her side for the entire party. (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a collegebuddy. (-2)
Named Tina. (-4)
Tina is a dancer. (-10)
Tina has breast implants. (-80)
Really big breast implants. (-200)
==============================
HER BIRTHDAY:
You take her out to dinner. (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar. (+1)
Okay, it is a sports bar. (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night. (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is paintedthe colours of your favourite team. (-10)
==============================
A NIGHT OUT:
You take her to a movie. (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes. (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate. (+6)
You take her to a movie you like. (-2)
And it's called "DeathCop". (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans that was featuredon "Oprah". (-15)
==============================
YOUR PHYSIQUE:
You develop a noticeable potbelly. (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it. (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggyHawaiian shirts. (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-10,000)
==============================
ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION:
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5)[Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT you say.]
You hesitate in responding. (-10)
You reply, "Wh! ere?" (-35)
Any other response. (-20)
==============================
COMMUNICATION:
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying whatlooks like a concerned expression. (0)
You listen for over 30 minutes. (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV. (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep. (-5,000)


1 comment:

n8 b said...

I ACED this mofo....