Sin City Here I Am (part two in an epic two-part mini-series)

TJ woke me up at about 8 on Saturday morning. That wouldn't have been so bad if we didn't stay up until 5 the night before. "Let's get the truck unloaded before it gets hot" was his reasoning. At 8 in the morning it was already in the mid eighties. In L-town it hits mid eighties in the middle of Summer so to have it that hot at 8 in the morning was a little hard to take.
As we were moving shit up to their second floor condo, the condo's security guard rolled on over to our truck in his golf cart.
"You guys better get some Gatorade. It's gonna be hot today." My first thought was "No shit dumbass. It's fucking eighty degrees at 8 in the morning." "If you're not from around here the heat may surprise you" the security guard added. TJ asked him if water would be okay or if we better run down to the store and grab some Gatorade. The guard replied that "Yeah, water would probably work too."
After he rolled off we finished unpacking the truck. Since it was already a beautiful day, and we were all warm from moving shit on a hot day, we decided to hit the pool. We hung out at the pool for about an hour before heading back up to the condo, having a little chat with the coach, and taking a little six hour nap.
After waking up from our naps, Jill and TJ said we should head over to the new Red Rocks Casino and check out their buffet. The coach agreed with this thought and we were on our way.
Next time your in Vegas stop by and check out the Red Rocks. It's new but it's not right on the strip. It's a very nice place, and I didn't get lost once. Last time we were in Sin City we stayed at the MGM Grand and over the course of three days I got lost about five times. The numerous Heinekens may have played a part in that too though.
After spending a solid couple of hours chowing down, we decided to do some gambling. I decided to hit up the "Wheel of Fortune" slot machines and proceeded to almost immediately go up fifty bucks. I then gave it all back to the casino while waiting for my Heineken that never showed. Stupid waitress bitch. I mean don't tell somebody you're going to bring them a refreshing Heine and then not show. That's just rude.
After gambling a little we decided to go check out Fremont and the light show. Somewhere along the way we had managed to lose a couple of hours and by the time we got to Fremont, the light show was done for the evening. We hit a couple of casinos on Fremont for beverages and decided to head down to the strip.
I forget the name of the place, but on the strip there is a casino that has a mechanical bull in the bar. This sounded terrific. Let's get hammered and then go get hurt. After making our way through the casino and to the entrance of the bar, we decided that we didn't want to pay the cover if we weren't going to be able to ride the bull. And on Saturday night's they have bikini girl bull-riding. If I had another week or so to hang out in Vegas I would have checked it out. Since I was leaving the next morning we head back out onto the strip.
After unsuccessfully trying to get a parking spot at the Double-Down Saloon we decided to make our way to the Hard Rock Casino for Carmen Electra's Celebrity Poker tournament. Well the tournament must've been over already, cause none of us spotted any celebrities. A little more gambling and a couple of Heinekens later we decided to head back to Jill & TJ's place.
On our way out of the Casino we spotted none other than Skid Row's own Sebastian Bach passed the fuck out on a slot machine. This was easily the highlight of my weekend. Right in front of us was the mastermind behind such hits as 18 and life and some other shit I can't remember right now. Awesome.
On the way back we hit the drive-thru of the infamous Fatburger. Nothing to write home about. Anyhoo, we head back to the condo and proceeded to p.t.f.o. I believe it was about five in the morning.
The next morning Jill woke me up at about ten to go to breakfast. I was in for a treat. The Hash House A Go-Go is tha shiznit. I have never seen a plate of food as outrageous as the meals at the Go-Go.
The size of Jill and TJ's pancakes were unreal so I took a pic just to document it. My waffle was also giant in that it was about a square foot and about an inch and a half thick. The pancakes were about fourteen inches across and about a half an inch thick.
We gorged ourselves on breakfast and then made a quick pit stop by the condo. I grabbed my bag, had a quick motivational pep talk with the coach, and was off to the airport.
After one of the most turbulent rides of my flying career I landed safe and sound in PDX. My only regret was that I couldn't stay in Vegas longer.