Movies

"I know, it's hard to imagine a magical-talking-airplane movie letting you down, but there you go." -Eric Snider, efilmcritic.com, about the movie Stealth.
From www.minerwerks.com/mess.html Critical Mess
(taking 100% realmovie quotes and using them to make very funny movie posters.)
featured on http://www.moviepoopshoot.com/ (from Kevin Smith's View Askew site)
Damn, that's 2 more sites for you, plus view askew and movie poop shoot have tons of links just by themselves. I expect people to read a lot of shit I find. Finding great sites on the internet could be a fulltime job that Smoot and I would be good at, and would enjoy.

Or my new favorite as I read a few
"Mr. Schneider, You're movie sucks!" Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun Times, about
the movie Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
http://www.moviepoopshoot.com/mess/31.html

upcoming movies:
http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=hv&cf=info&id=1808475610
harry potter goblet of fire
I'm a Harry Potter geek, which I read doesn't make you attractive to the opposite sex, but I don't care, because I don't need to care.
So I will watch kids movies and read kids books, and go see this on opening day.
also, Office Space (Special Edition) is on dvd now, including how Swingline Staplers now sell red staplers and they are their number one seller, all because ofthe movie. http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/officespacedvd.html
I'm also excited about this;
http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=hv&cf=info&id=1808556813
Pirates of the Carribean 2
also Tripping the Rift season one is on dvd, link already on the site.

Try to follow me on this one

- Busy Busy Busy with many random thoughts floating through my head. The most recent, that Abby just got offered a job. SHIT YEAH! It's only half-time, but it gets her in the system so The Man can't keep her down any more. Call her and congratulate her if you know her number.

- http://www.angelfire.com/ma/justliving (my website) has been updated, well at least a little bit. This includes a dorky temp/clock for Longview, and some new links.
(and no, I still haven't gotten the other wedding pictures up on my site. I am lazy and I procrastinate. And although I apologize for it, I am not sorry enough to change my ways.)

- http://www.tvguide.com/News/Insider/?cmsGuid={AE026F8A-1D75-4F5D-B4E9-55C1E6579C99} http://blogs.nbc.com/office/ These two are blogs by people on the show The Office, which follows Earl and I have mentioned before I think.

- My Name is Earl is still very funny, and between that and The Office, I actually plan to watch TV tuesdays if I can remember. I told myself I didn't want to be that guy who plans life around a show, but that was before I set my phone to remind me it was 9:00 last Tuesday, and now Abby has me watching Lost and Invasion on Wednesdays, I plan to watch Cougar Football on Saturdays, and I plan to watch the Hawks on Sundays. So between that, weddings all summer (including one more this Saturday), being busy with work for 5- 6 months straight, after-work hobnobbing at Chamber of Commerce and Lions Club funcitons, and club volleyball coming up, I pretty much get nothing done now. (In fact, I typed most of this last night, and just added the below stuff in a quick couple minutes...)

- I may have mentioned before, that now we have MUSAK (elevator music for offices) at the bank now, and how 5 in 100 songs are actually songs I enjoy, and another 15-20 songs are ones I make fun of, and the rest are just horrible. Well...right now Pump Up the Jam by C&C Music Factory is playing...in a bank...at 9:15 in the morning. And my boss doesn't understand why I like Dilbert. Man looking on the positive side of things and having inside jokes just makes my warm inside. Kind of like Liquor.

- Dodgeball tonight. We are gonna smoke them, and I plan to wear wristbands that are red,white, and blue. Partly because thats the only ones I have, and partly because I watched Best of the Best last night. Did anyone remember that Amahd Rashad (ESPN) was the announcer in that movie? Man he was young then. And that movie is so horrible, but still brings a tear to my eye when the Koren fighter says "To save a life in defeat, is to earn victory and honor" or some shit like that. So touching. Eric Roberts and Chris Penn are very good actors...(that's sarcasm Nate in case you don't get it...)

http://www.clerks2.com/ I plan to check out more about The Passion Of The Clerks (Clerks 2) which is in production. Man I can't wait for this movie.

Busy couple days...Go Cougs

Busy couple days...First off, Cougs need to go make a donation to hurricane relief, if you are so inclined, because it will also help the cougs get the space needle painted crimson & gray for apple cup http://www.spaceneedle.com/(The cougs play Arizona St. this weekend, so maybe we will finally win...)

other busy type things. Abby's C-squad team is done for the year, but now she is one of the assistant coaches for the varsity team, who is headed to Tumwater to try and win districts and a spot at state for the first time in 8-10 years. If you happen to read the sports section tomorrow, look for R.A. Long to see how they did.

The Blazers opened the season with a loss. Their first home game is saturday, which I hope to go to, but with Abby at Districts that day, and another wedding here in town that day, I am not sure what the weekend holds for me yet. Probably drinking somewhere.

I bought a 2005 Ford Escape. Anyone in the market for a 2000 VW Jetta VR6, or a 2000 V6 Explorer? Cause Abby wants a new car also and we need to sell both our rigs.

And dodgeball again this Friday, with all the teams in the league splitting their matches last week, Team McNeely hopes to break the 4-way tie with back to back wins this friday.

Found an Old Email

Anyone find an old email or joke and re-read it and find it still funny?

Top 15 Star Wars Euphemisms for Masturbation

1. Shooting Womprats in Beggar's Canyon
2. Grooming the Wookie
3. Making the Kessel Run
4. Polishing Vader's Helmet
5. Evacuating Tatooine
6. Unsheathing the Meatsaber
7. Releasing the Special Edition
8. Jumping to Delight Speed
9. Communicating with Red Leader One
10. Lightsaber Practice with Captain Solo
11. Tinkering with the R2 Unit
12. Manually Targeting the Rebel Base
13. Performing the Jedi Hand Trick
14. Scratching Yoda Behind the Ears
15. Test Firing the Death Star

I would say 14, 12, 6, 3, and 1 are the funniest. I would post something more original, or maybe a funny original comment, but I have to go consume halloween cookies and candy and not get any work done. Happy Halloween.

okay, one original one...Using the Force on Obi-One-Eye-Kenobi

okay one more, but not star wars related...Shaking Hands with the Unemployed

Bumper Stickers

I followed a honda to work today sporting the following gems:

Guns Kill People, Like Spoons

Made Rosie O'Donnel Fat

along with:

Bush / Cheney 04

I thought it was a funny combination. But nowhere near as good as my favorite stickers:

If You Don't Like The

Way I Drive,

Stay Off The Sidewalk

and:

My Kid Beat Up

Your Honor Student

dreaming about pooping

I have discovered a nightmare that is worse than the one where you are falling, or the one where you are speaking in public...in your underwear, or the one with the evil ronald mcdonald (long story...). I am of course refering to the dreams where you have to urinate or deficate in the dream and have nowhere private to go, or for some other reason can't "let loose," although it is very evident that your dream-self really needs to go.

For some people this is usually prompted by waking up in the middle of night, and after a few painful minutes your body convinces you that the reason you are up is so that you can run to the bathroom. (of course, for a few of you, this dream prompts nothing, and you wake in a pile of fluids that you created...) Now I am not saying that this happened to me, but in the dream I didn't have last night, I ended up shitting all over the place in an aquaintence's house (not the bathroom for some reason) before waking and finding to my delight that it was in fact just a stomach ache. My body thankfully allowed me (if this had happened) to go in to the other room and do some word search instead of spending the early morning burning sheets, pajamas, and probably the mattress.

What's the worst dream you've had lately?
And were you happy you had it (like I was, uhhh hypothetically)?

Poop (and Dilbert)

Well...talking about poop, and/or pooping, seems to make you famous if you believe the Jason Mulgrew hype, and this random thought crossed my mind while I was updating adobe reader at work and my eyes fell on the little "search Yahoo" button.

I could think of no better way to pass the next minute and a half of my life then to search "poop" and then post a couple links on here for the blogging community. (and don't miss the jokes in the last post, especially the picture of boobees...)

• "About 3/4 of your average turd is made of water." http://www.heptune.com/poop.html quotes like that and questions like "Why does poop stink?" "Why is poop brown?" and "Can you get sick from eating poop?" will keep you entertained for minutes...
• http://www.poopreport.com/ with Poop of the Week and the Poop Blog, Your #1 Source for your #2 business
• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poop the Wikipedia definition (wikipedia, home of the best "coug'n it" definition I've seen, which they did again last weekend...fuckers)
• http://www.doodie.com/ "offers several interactive cartoons featuring characters...uh...pooping." and some other funny links

http://www.dilbert.com/ also, Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert comics and a few short novels that I have mentioned in my ramblings, has his own blog http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/. He had a good post (actually, they are all pretty good, kind of like Mulgrew's and my site...) about having No Sense of Embarassment. I like that, and am posting that as my blog heading from now on.

I have been trying for a while (and by trying I mean he just reminded me, I don't actually put much thought into anything...) to come up with a phrase for myself and the attitude I inherited from my Father.
"I am secure enough to make people laugh at me, I think I am vaugely funny, and I like to make people laugh, therefore people laugh at me a lot. And I am okay with it." That can be my motto. That, and "I like Beer."

Jokes and Golf and Football

Happy Halloween from two Boobees.
and the blog title in reverse order...
GO HAWKS
Stupid Cougars, I was let down again.
I finally golfed after a month or so off, and was 7 over on 3 holes, and 8 over total for 81. So other than those 3 holes, I played really well, and considering I blew up right in the middle, I would say I had good composure to finish off only 8 over.

and guest blogger Alex N. strikes again...

• At dawn the telephone rings.
• "Hello, Senor Lucky? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."
• "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
• "Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor, that your parrot died."
• "My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
• "Si, Senor, that's the one."
• "Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. "What did he die from?"
• "From eating rotten meat, Senor."
• "Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
• "Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
• "Dead horse? What dead horse?"
• "The thoroughbred, Senor Lucky. He died from all that work pulling the water cart."
• "Are you insane? What water cart?"
• "The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."
• "Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
• "The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
• "What the hell? There's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
• "For the funeral, Senor."
• "WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!"
• "Your wife's, Senor...She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."
• "Ernesto if you broke that driver, you're in deep shit!"

and another from Alex

• A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my beautiful wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy! What do you think I should do?"
• "Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm down. Now tell me, where is Larry's bar?"

pullman stinks

Well, actually it was the drive over that stunk. A couple times we passed areas that must have been having used diaper burning contests. Either that, or we found where they bottle "Sex Panther" from the movie Anchorman. (You know its good cause its got pieces of real panther...)

For those of you in the know, Shakers is gone. It is now called Mikes, and since there was only 1 floor now, the line was too big to wait in. But looking through the window, it looked like it sucked. hard. They pushed the bar all the way back to the wall, so it looks like a trendy night club or something. Fuck them. Oh yeah, and fuck the cougs for Coug'n it again. We left early to watch them finish off UCLA at the Coug, and surprise, surprise, they coughed up the lead. again.

Pluses to the weekend in Pullman:
The Coug
Bob who owns The Coug, because we can legitimately say "we know the owner."
Drinking from 9-1...AM on both those times...thats right, over 15 hours.
Cougar Country....hhhmmmm, burgers
64 oz beers at Sellas...hmmm, calzones
the downstairs bathroom at KD's (no abby, go upstairs, Gina's already in there...)
Me and Jose were easily the drunkest people at Sellas...and we ordered the biggest beers... (P.S. Jose, I have your 64 oz mason jar you "borrowed")
I won $5 off USC, and didn't bet on the cougs so I lost no money on them.

Negatives to the weekend in Pullman:
It takes up like 7 hours to get there
Shakers is no longer shakers, and still has a long ass line
I didnt get any pizza pipeline
Abby was too hungover for us to get Cougar Country on the way out of town
I spent way over 100 bucks getting there and back. $2.89 a gallon can suck my nuts
I didnt get to visit the downstairs bathroom at KD's...

Movies

http://jessicaalba.fanhost.com/ Jessica Alba is Hot. I am going to go buy Sin City, and while I'm thinking about it, I'm gonna order Batman too. Both those movies kicked ass.

So..Best Movie of the last year or so?
I say Anacondas, Hunt for the Blood Orchid.
That or Troy.
What do you think?

I still haven't seen War of the Worlds or Kingdom of Heaven, but those looked good too. As for chick flicks, Love Actually and the Notebook were good. Bridget Jones was funny so I could stomach that one too. Of course, if I had a choice between any of those and the new Steven Segal crap, I would choose the one where the guy with the beads kicks the crap out of everyone hands down...And I can't wait for the next Harry Potter, because I am one of "those guys."

edit: and while searching new releases, I found this gem. I am sure you have all been waiting for it, so here is the link...http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000AM4P86/102-9356058-0898531?v=glance&n=130

Gus & Brian Baird

Gus
Search your name, or nickname in this case, and find wierd shit.
http://www.gusgus.com/index.php?page=News GusGus, the official site
http://www.twistedmatrix.com/~gus/dswj/ some chicks blog, wonderfuly named the Dancing Sausage, which would be my nickname instead of Gus if I was a Stripper...
http://www.gusinc.com/ , which for 13 years has been serving people with communication disorders and physical limitations

so in reverse, I'm a retarded stripper in a band named after the fat mouse from Cinderella. Sweet....

Brian Baird
http://www.tdn.com/articles/2005/10/12/area_news/news05.txt
An article in the Daily Snooze about Salmon and my new favorite polictian bashing the experts. I heard him speak last night at a Lower Columbia Contractors Association dinner, and he really won me over. He sounded like he made sense, and didn't sound like he was just kissing ass, so hes got my vote. Of course I hate politics, and if the next guy sounded as intelligent as him, I would say he had my vote too, but us lazy voters can't be perfect. I was just happy they had beer.

Welcome to the Suck

With a clever title like that, I am sure you are expecting more fun porn titles. Sorry, but I am actually referring to Longview. http://www.ci.longview.wa.us/ That's right, we have a website. I don't actually hate Longview, but in order to be popular here, you have to make fun of yourself and your town, so there you go.

(and just to keep some of you interested, "Face Jam" and "Star Whores" are a few classics...)

and in the wonderful world of Fantasy Football, I have gone 5-0 so far. Which is saying something considering the talent we have in our league...But seriously, I feel like I am setting myself up to "Coug-it" bad. Which is why I will be heading to Pullman this weekend to try and perform a pre-emptive strike on the coug-hex by watching as much football and drinking as much beer as possible until the end of the football season. If that isn't enough to please the football gods, then I don't deserve to hold this lead and win in the playoffs....Kind of like the cougs.

Moo, and home values

You all wish you be Garrett's dog, and be this happy about absolutely nothing...

either he is full, or the carpet is soft, or someone was just petting him, or whatever it is...ahhhh, the simple life of licking your nuts, eating, sleeping, and pooping...

and for those of you not into puppy dogs and pooping discussions, how about this. at a recent seminar talking about trends in the home market and the "bursting bubble", they ended with these conclusions:

• Evidence that home prices have moved up faster in recent months than inflation and income, but long-term evidence suggests this increase may have been just "catch-up"
• Some likelihood of bubble developing slow leak, but with low rates and good consumer sentiment, probability of bubble pop is low
• OR and WA appear in good shape and long-term demographic trends suggest some ease in rate of growth, but no bursting of bubble.

Which means, I hope you were able to latch on to a house in the last 5 years, becuase it sounds like the recent home price value increases are here to stay. Which appears to be good to the tune of at least $40k for me, and way more for people like James that bought in very valuable areas. I wouldn't be surprised if James made $100k just becuase of the current market... Damn

Guest Blogger - Meshuggah

For your webpage:
So you think you know metal? You don't know jack. Meshuggah, a Swedishmetal band who released their first album in 1989, continues they're torridpace with a full-length album entitled "Catch Thirty-thr33." The albumfollows their first EP in ten years called "I," which was released in late2004. The newest edition to the Meshuggah discography features a slowerpace, but intricate and complex rhythms typical of Meshuggah's style. Newto this album are programmed drums, mostly produced by their drummer, TomasHaake, but also created by other members of the band. Overall, the album isan A. Meshuggah will be at Berbati's Pan in Portland on Tuesday, October25.

Alex

(anyone else got a review, opinion, picture or joke? be a guest blogger. send it to me via email.)

new favorite

http://www.nbc.com//My_Name_Is_Earl/
"My Name is Earl," Tuesdays at 9:00 on NBC
(followed by "The Office," which is also very funny.

Earl got picked up for the rest of the season, 22 episodes. I am very happy because I am so tired of unfunny reality crap that keeps getting regurtitated on the public about 3-6 times a season...plus the existing reality shows on season 13 or so...plus the cross-over shows and spin-offs from those long-running reality shows. Its nice to see a funny sitcom introduced and see it actually take hold. I'm not saying all reality shows are bad. Kathy Griffen is actually pretty damn funny. And I don't mind the game show styles like Amazing Race and Fear Factor. But then there is Survivor which borders on bad, and the rest that are just so edited that they make one person the stereotype bitch, one the asshole, one the jock, one the funny guy, one (or two) the slut, one the geek, etc. These people aren't stars, and about 80% of them don't deserve to be on TV, let alone asked back to another show or god forbid their own show. Bring back the sitcoms. I don't watch a lot of TV, but when I do I would rather turn on a Friends or Everybody Loves Raymond episode that I have already seen, then to watch one more fucking new reality show... I sure hope that Earl and shows like Grey's Anatomy and CSI and Law and Order can turn TV back to the way it was...almost reality free.

KARMA GUIDE - by Earl

• As I go through life, fixing my mistakes one at a time, I’ve learned a thing or two about Karma, and part of keeping good Karma is sharing it with others. I hope these notions help you as much as they’ve helped me.
• Do good things and good things will happen to you. Do bad things and it will come back and bite you in the ass.
• If you want a better life, you need to be a better person.
• Bad luck might be contagious. It wouldn’t be fair to bring someone into your life until you clean yours up.
• Never underestimate the power of confidence. And never underestimate fifteen beers, a little enlightenment, and the power of Rob Base and DJ Easy Rock.
• A person needs a little rest after having his moustache tickled at a gay bar.
• You have to do the hard things in life sooner or later.
• If you want the reward, you have to do the work.
• The secret to life is fixing all the bad things that you’ve done.
• Whether picking up trash, returning stolen merchandise, or helping a homosexual find love, it always has the same reward… feeling good about yourself.

Karma. You got to love it.

fantasy skillz

thats right sports fans, yours truly is 4-0 in fantasy football, only undefeated team, and ahead by a comfortable margin. The biggest reward...having a bunch of know-it-alls fall silent in the shit-talking department.

jason lee's reception was this weekend. very fun, very beautiful slide show up at Sahalle country club in sammamish (near seattle). needless to say the reception was prempted by the prefunk, and followed by the afterfunk, and then the bar scene, all followed by steak and eggs aroung 4:00 AM. so we woke up at the crack of noon or so to watch the USC game (no coug game on) then finished off the night drinking, eating pizza, playing video games, watching football, and not doing anything useful or preductive. pretty nice.

then comes monday and back to work. dammit.

Go Cougs

I like beaver. Anyone remember the homecoming shirt from back in 96 or 97 that had a cougar eating a beaver or beaver cereal or something like that? I hope the cougars dump all over them in the rain-fest that will be this saturday's game down in Corvallis. GO COUGS!

I will unfortunately not be going, as my drinkin skilz are required up in Seattle for Lee's reception. But I plan to root on the Cougs from a big screen somewhere in the Emerald City. Man I love beer.
and boobies.

aaaahhhhh fuck those guys

This is a little late if you already read the title, or any previous posts, but I use cuss words and stuff. What you would call, a potty mouth.

"The Parental Advisory is a notice to consumers that recordings identified by this logo may contain strong language or depictions of violence, sex or substance abuse. Parental discretion is advised."

I install this wonderful image upon you, to remind you of the days when you couldn't buy the new Public Enemy cd and so you stuck it to the man by getting your cousin to buy it for you. Or in my case, the new Eddie Murphy or Chris Rock cd. Or again in my case, having to show your ID no less than 3 years ago for a CD, and a year or two before that for fireworks...(lets see 28, minus 3 is 25, minus 2 more is 23, and you have to be 18 and 16 respectively to buy those items...THOSE FUCKERS).

And I also brought you the image to lead into the topic of violence in video games, which is a big topic for people today. And by people I of course mean narrow minded conservative fuckheads that think that violent video games are the reasons I call them fuckheads. Duhhhh, TV is the reason I call them fuckheads. They are listening to the wrong bullshit studies...

http://www.tdn.com/articles/2005/09/27/this_day/news03.txt Our local paper has a great quote in the middle of this article...

- "There really isn't any room for doubt that aggressive game playing leads to aggressive behaviors," says Iowa State University psychologist Craig A. Anderson, one of the pioneers of research in the area and a guiding force behind the association's resolution.

- But the association's action came just weeks after University of Illinois researcher Dmitri Williams, in a study of 213 players of a violent online game called "Asheron's Call 2," concluded that a month of steady, intensive play did not increase participants' aggressiveness. His study did not focus on children but included some players as young as 14.

I have said it before, and I'll say it again.
I would have no difficulty writing a thesis on any topic that would positively prove the point that for every study that says one thing, there is another that says the opposite. So video game bashers can go fuck themselves. Hard.

The Wonders of a Small Town Paper

Living in Longview has its ups and downs. The ups being beer, the smell of the mill, and a pretty decent cost of living. The downs being the cummulative realization that we border on the "hick-town" mentality. That and lite beer... (Recent examples include not wanting a new Lowe's because it's near peoples housing, while at the same time complaining that our county employement rate is the worst in the state...and some bullshit called rock green lite which is rolling rock that tastes like water and is better for you or something...)
I read a few funny things in the local paper today (www.tdn.com), and the more I looked, the more I couldn't realize whether I should cry...or move.

Eye Catcher Headlines:
SCOTCH & BEER (Food - Page C1) Now, this one isn't too bad, but not exactly big city...
R.A. LONG SPIKES KELSO (Sports - Page D1) Can't sports writers come up with NEW headlines?
MOSTLY NICE (High 71 Low 48 Page C8) That is a terribly vague description.
ALVORD SCOLDS A PREP COACH (Sports Page D1) A sports writer's opinion counts now???

Articles starting on the Front Page:
Meth tax going down: After close vote, county looks at resubmitting 0.2% sales-tax increase to combat meth abuse. (So it lost, so how about we waste money voting again???)
Woodland school bond passing by less than 1%: Measure to provide $3.75 million to buy land for a new high school is too close to call. (This county will not spend money to fight drugs or open schools. Great message to send out...)
Botero will face Melink for Longview council: Busack will be heavy favorite for other City Council Seat. (Its votin time on the farm again, and the people remain heavily indecisive on all issues...)
Kelso boy hospitalized after ingesting narcotic: Toddler will recover; charges pending. (I have to quote a line from the article to emphasize this one) "The resident told police he believed that a drop-in guest must have dropped a methadone pill and the child ate it." "Child protective services is investigating to determine if it is safe for the child to return home." (I swear we are not all drug taking idiots, but you would never tell from our front page.)
Growing Rita brushes Keys (Too lazy to spell out Hurricane and Florida.)
Japan's mafia created Katrina, weatherman claims (I guess it could be worse, we could be from Idaho Falls where some weatherman believes some stupid crap posted on the internet. Of course we put it on our paper, which is sad...)

Coming in the daily news:
Thursday: Punk band will attend opening of new Longview music store
Friday: The Potholes - Anglers adapt to new conditions at huge desert reservior in Central Washington
Saturday: Will RAL topple Fort? - Complete game coverage
(those are three attention grabbers that are sure to peak the attention of the teenagers, fisherman, and soccer moms of our county, which asside from the druggies and politicians, makes up the rest of our popluation...)

Double post time (to make up for days of incompetence)

Anyone planning on watching "My Name is Earl" tuesday night?
Looks very funny.
Plus Jason Lee seems to play the part perfectly in the commercials.

edit: I thought the pic would be bigger, but go to www.nbc.com and click on earl to see a bigger list.
He is going to right the wrongs he has done, including:

getting a lap dance from a friends mom and not paying her

sleeping with his prom date's sister...on prom night

littering